Today I want to share with you something that I observed that goes along the lines of the generations intertwining and working together.
My husband is a very strong and independent man. He is the tale end of the Baby boomers and beginning of the Generation Xer. His attitude towards life and work is reflective of both those generations but he has a great respect for the Traditionalists as well. Yesterday was a great day for me to observe this in action.
Relationships. I have never seen such a symbiotic relationship as I observed yesterday between my husband and his father. Two totally different individuals yet they worked together like they knew what each other was thinking, they could anticipate each others next move. They get along amazingly well. I was in awe watching them work together. Hubby has been busily working to get his boat sea worthy. The weather has taken it's toll on the boats interior. So he decided that he was going to strip down the interior and rebuild the cabinets and benches. Yesterday was the day for working on the cabinets. My husband is not a carpenter by trade nor is his father but you wouldn't know it. His dad made the new drawers and hubby made the outer shell. Yesterday was the day for putting it together. The two of them without a word just started piecing things together. Silence, the only noise you heard was that of the tools. Hubby knew when his dad needed a hand and his father knew when he needed to step in. It was wonderful to watch.
As many of you know I come from a large family. I have 6 brothers. You know I can honestly say I never observed at time when my father and brothers ever got along when working on a project the way my hubby and his father do. My father was the dictator and what he said went. My brothers fought back. Needless to say they clashed and arguments were common.
That has not been the case with hubby and his dad. I have never seen them argue. They are like best friends. They have a connection like I have never observed before. Both very independent men yet able to appreciate and respect each others opinions. The behaviour was just amazing to watch that I just had to get out my camera. I have many more photos than what I am sharing here, but sometimes a picture says a thousand words.
The guys working independently
And then without saying a word, they join forces and work together
So I guess the lesson I have learnt here, is that we CAN work together. We don't have to clash at every turn. If we respect each other and acknowledge that we all have something valuable to offer.
Cheers all and I wish you a grand and happy Thursday!
23 comments:
really beautiful post about your husband and his father - what a special relationship :)
happy Thursday!
We have just learned to argue in private....what a facade!!!! LOL!!
No really, we just seem to know what needs to be done and although it is not evident, the supervisory roles are in place when decisions are in question.
Thanx RN for the tribute.
Me.
Nothing constructive to add -- I liked your husband's comment, though.
that's wonderful! I hope my kids will enjoy the same relationship with their dad and I as your husband and his father do. After thinking on your former post a bit, it ocurred to me that my mother often complains that I don't consult her enough, that I read too much and research too much. I realize now, that when she was a parent of young children she got the majority of her advice on parenting from her mother (traditionalist). From my mother's point of view, I don't value her experience, not to mention the fact that most of my knowledge is gained through the internet (technology).
Perhaps the self-reliance of the gen-x/y's comes across as superiority and lacking repect for the older generation, something previous generations valued highly. I mean, how many times have we all (and I mean all generations) heard our parents say condescendingly, "I wish I knew as much as my kids think they do!" lol
Just one more example of the generation gap.
My Mom and I had a very contentious relationship - at least one argument a day or the day wasn't complete! There are times when I think if my older daughter lived nearer to me we too would have the same kind of relationship as Mom and I had. My younger daughter, on the other hand, I learned a long time ago that the best way to deal with her was to let her go on her own way and not argue. But if she is confused, encounters a problem she's never seen, experienced, heard of before, she will automatically come and talk it over with me which her older sister would never do. The older girl would go her own way, not think things through clearly and then, maybe tell me the offshoot of what was going on. She's slowly learning that there are a few things I have experienced and can ward off potential problems if she asks about things before acting. The younger one and my son too, both tend to talk things over with me first, then make decisions. The older girl has a "get even" attitude, which the two other kids - thankfully - don't have. It's a long drawn out process though to acquire harmony at times. LOL
you know Jeni, that is very true, experience can ward off potential problems. The older I get, the more I trust my mother and grandmother's opinions. I may not ask for their advice often, but I truly do value their experience.
Douglas, it appears that you did as good a job picking your father as you did picking your wife. :-)
What a loving post and it truly captures the great father/son relationship! Perfect for Father's Day :)
You always have such thought provoking posts!!!
:)
It's nice to see how these 2 work together. It's how it should be but isn't in many cases. Respect for others goes a long way. Great post.
Mary Anne, that is SO lovely. I love to see parents and their children get along like that. It's so rare, you know. But it should be and can be wonderful. They sound like two peas in a pod.
Josie
My dad died when I was 21; my mother when I was 45. My dad and I could work side by side and always get along but my mom and I couldn't - until my father died. She and I got along marvelously until her passing and I am so thankful for that! She was very wise and I never hesitated to ask for her advice. I wish I still could...
Very nice post. I am glad they have such a special relationship. Now a days you don't find much of that. Kids today demand things from there parents, and they don't take the time to build things. It is buy me this or buy me that. I fear for the children of the next few generations! It is nice to see that moments like these, as rare as they are, still exist!
Thanks for sharing!
great post! very rare to have a relationship like that with your parents
My mother has been a nurse my entire life, and even before I was born. I remember the white uniform from when I was very little...I'd watch her get ready for work in the morning. Nowadays, I have never seen a traditional white nurses uniform. Everyone wears scrubs nowadays.
I think it is great that your Husband and his Father get along so well.
Oh wow, this was beautiful! What a special bond they share.
I've enjoyed reading your last 2 posts. When I was teaching, I worked with young women who were younger than my daughters and those who were much older than me. However, I have to say that we all looked at each other as equals in the work place. We were teachers - nothing more nothing less. We never thought about our ages; rather, we helped each other out any way we could to enhance our careers for the sake of the children. But I do see what you mean about the younger generation in general - I see it in my own kids.
I thank the grace of powers that be that Doug and his dad have such a great relationship.The strength of it came after retirement when free time was ever present. My heart warms every time I see them together as all of you are right, It is verry special.
The Mother.
Well, on the nurse’s uniform…
I always thought that when the nurses worn their school hats it was a mark of honor and I enjoyed them. I respect the amount of education and training it takes to become a nurse.
Working together….
I loved the story. This is my goal in life. To work with no ego.. helping others and accepting help with no thoughts of “better than…. Lesser than…”
Great post
steve
When I was 15 I was disgusted at how little my father knew. Now I am surprised at how much he has learned. lol
Douglas
No doubt, he learned it from you. ;-)
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