When is a Lie a Lie?

Have you ever had the discussion about when is a lie a lie? I have. Do you think it is as basic as just not telling the truth? Do you consider a little white lie a lie? And what is a little white lie anyhow? Would you consider it a lie if your friend asked you what you thought she looked like it a particular outfit and you told her she looked fine, when actually you think it is to revealing or to tight or not the right colour, but you don't want to give her your true opinion for fear of hurting her feelings. Would you consider that a lie? Is it a lie when you ask your child not to hang out with a certain someone and when they come home you ask who they were with...they tell you they were with all kinds of people but they neglect to tell you that certain person you don't want them to be around was there as well. Is that a lie? You find an error on receipt and it is in your favour, is it a lie not to fess up and give the funds back? A family treasure has gotten broken, you did it or you know who did it do you fess up or let be or tell them the cat did it? If a lie is a lie plain and simple, then should all lies be treated the same?

In looking on the net for a definition of a lie this is what I found:

v. lied, ly·ing (lng), lies

1. To present false information with the intention of deceiving.
2. To convey a false image or impression: Appearances often lie.
v.tr.
To cause to be in a specific condition or affect in a specific way by telling falsehoods: You have lied yourself into trouble.Idiom:
lie through one's teeth
To lie outrageously or brazenly.
lie - a statement that deviates from or perverts the truth

I for one know that I have told a lie. Something I am not proud of. In looking at the definition of a lie, I think I had a misguided idea of what a lie was. I didn't want to hurt anyone. I didn't want to tell the truth about something or someone for fear of hurting feelings and repercussions. The funny thing about that is someone always gets hurt, and usually that someone is the person telling the lie. Lies are like parasites, they eat you up inside, and they can spread like a virus causing harm to those around you.

I was terrible at commitment. I feared it. I wanted it, but I didn't know how to go about getting it. Through my lack of commitment came lies. Lies to myself and lies to those that I couldn't commit to. The reason for my lack of commitment varied, some due to childhood experiences, some due to lack of confidence in myself, some due to fear of loss, and what ifs. As a result came the lies. Personally, I never intentionally told a lie to hurt anyone. In fact that is what I was trying to avoid. Little did I know that it would backfire.

As we grow I like to think we learn. Learn from our life's experiences. If telling a lie has caused grief in the past chances are it will always cause grief. If not for the person you are telling the lie to then to yourself. It is so easy to fall into the trap of telling a lie.

So, when is a Lie a Lie?

My 200th Post.......

Today is a special day for me...it is my 200th post. I know that doesn't seem like a lot to most, but to me it is a milestone. So what shall I post about? All posts have some meaning to the author or why else would we post? But there are some posts that seem to have had more impact on me than others. So if you will indulge me I would like to share with you some of those posts.

The post I did in remembrance of my mom Kathleen Sandford
The post when I asked you what you thought When is a Lie a Lie
Then there's my Christmas Tree post. I enjoyed that because it included my brother. He hadn't had a Christmas like that for many many years, and it just warmed my heart that my hubby and I were able to give that to him so here is my Christmas Tree 2006
My post on living life in the moment. Something my daughter showed me"

Then there are the post when I converted to "Beta"and all the fun I had with that ....NOT! And of course all of the meme's, the contests, Photo Scavenger hunt(which I haven't been able to participate in for the past two weeks....boo hoo)the weather and all the storms and power outages I experienced this past fall and winter. Yes it has been fun. I have met some absolutely wonderful people, I truly feel like we are a community, an extended family. Wondering when Motherkitty's grandson was going to join the world, Cathy and Curmudgeon and their health challenges they were faced with. Those of you who lost loved ones or where reunited with loved ones. Wolfbaby and the "Wolfden soap" So many many wonderful stories that made me laugh and cry. I thank you all.

Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement along the way. You're a great bunch!

Today is also special as it is my step sons 12th Birthday! Yup a whole 12! He lives 4300km away and hence we won't be able to spend the day with him but at the end of the month he and his brother will be coming out to join us for the summer and we will celebrate then. So a very Happy Birthday to you my dear Jesse....love you very much! A Birthday cake and party await your arrival!

Happy Sunday all!

Our trip North Part I

I've been on holidays for a week now. My first week was spent doing odd chores around the house. We had our roof redone and hence we needed to be home. It was great to get it done, I don't know about you but I really don't' like having strangers working on my home. I mean these men didn't give me reason for concern about theft or anything, it's just that I like my space. One of the issues for us is that living in the country and out of sight, we don't have window coverings on any windows....none, zippo. So I had to be organized in the mornings I had to be up showered and dressed before the roofers arrived at 0800. It was all worth it in the end. We have our new roof and I am a very happy camper.

Saturday arrived and we were up and at it early as that tends to be our norm these days. I don't think I had my first latte, when hubby said the infamous words "Road Trip". With that I rushed about tidying up morning dishes making the bed and then packing clothes. Not knowing where we were going and or for how long you can imagine the difficulties in packing. Well for me anyways that can be a challenge, as for my hubby I pack for him. Not that he can't pack....ah I won't even go there. Anyhow, it was mid morning by the time we had things in the truck Bert and included, all I knew was that we were heading north. Oops I tell a lie....hubby had called the Mayor of a little town called Port Alice to find out about accommodations and the likes. Figures, if my hubby is going to ask a question he goes straight to the head person to get the answers. So yes back to the truck and off we went.

Vancouver Island from one end to the other is approximately 600km and 35km wide. We live mid Island. To travel from our home to the most northern part of the Island which is Cape Scott would take us about 4 hours. Our destination was Port Alice, which is about 3 1/2 hours from our home. So here are some photos of our trip.....well Part l. As always you can click on the photos to get a larger shot.

As we decided to take Bert with us on this trip rest stops were frequent. Our first stop was a place called Denman Island rest stop.

To the left of that tall tree is Bayne Sound, there is great fishing, crabbing, oyster fishing and prawns. So if seafood is your thing that is a great place.

Another hour or so down the road or should I say up the road is a city ......yes a city called Campbell River. Campbell River boasts to be the Salmon Capital of the world....but then I have heard that of other areas on the Island, but suffice to say fishing on the Island is absolutely the best to be had. This shot was taken believe it or not from a pulp mill site, I was looking from the shore toward the casino, when a heron just so happen to perch himself on the pilon.

A little further up the road we came to a place as the sign says Seymour Narrows, the sign says it all, except the next photo really doesn't give you a good feel of what the tides would have been like.

You can see the tug boat pulling log booms through the Narrows a very tricky task and a job only for the very seasoned sailors. In this same area there is a place out in the narrows called "Ripple Rock". It was the largest man made "Non Nuclear" explosion. It was performed in order to deepen the Narrows for larger ships to travel. Now days large cruise ships use this passage on their way to Alaska.
This is actually a amazing feet. If you want to see some live footage of the blast you can go to YouTube and type is Ripple Rock Explosion and you will see actual footage of the blast. Simply amazing for the time 1958.

The next few shots are just scenic photos of the mountains and road we travelled making our way north. One of our most favourite shots was that of the elk I spotted on the edge of the road. You see signs of Elk on the road all over the island but my hubby who has lived on the island since 1996 his never seen any. So to spot these big guys was a real treat. When I saw them the funny thing was I yelled "moose". Now I know they aren't moose but that was the first thing that came to mind in order to capture my hubby's attention. His reaction time was awesome and was able to make a turn off and we drove up the road and I was able to capture this photo.

We finally make it to the sign telling us which way to go......


Well as you can see we make the left turn and off to Port Alice we go. I will leave you with this and post Part II entitled "On the Road to Port Alice".

Until then, happy trails to you!

Insurance a false sense of security......

How many of you have been talked into buying those extended warranties? You know the ones when you go to Future Shop or Best Buy and you purchase some electronic and they want to you get the extended warranty....or you go and purchase an appliance and again they want you to purchase the extended warranty, and what about those one's on vehicles, now those can cost you. When I bought my Mustang it was practically new, they talked me into purchasing the extended warranty...what a goof I was, it cost me an additional $3500 for that insurance and I never used it.
Back to the salesperson who first off tries to sell you the most expensive item in the product line for which you are purchasing...you finally decide what it is you want and then of course they use the pitch on the extended warranty. I actually had a sales person try and sell me an extended warranty on a chair I bought for my husband. Can you believe it! I know these sales people make most of their money on selling the extended warranties but really it's just not right.

I am told that all products have a shelf life or life expectancy....how long a product is estimated to last. Personally I think the product should last that..and if it doesn't the manufacturer should be responsible for either replacing or repairing the product. It should also be affordable that if the product does only last the predicted life time then it's not going to cost you an arm and leg to replace it.

Now let's talk about life insurance, home insurance, mortgage insurance and health insurance. Again I am finding it to be a bunch of crap.

I got my first life insurance policy when I was 24 it was shortly after I had my first pacemaker and my first daughter had been born. I had my life insurance policy with this company up until last year, when it came time for my renewal. I went to renew and right out of the blue they cancelled my policy because they said I "lied" about my pacemaker. I was shocked. The only reason I went to this company was because I knew they provided policies for people who had pacemakers. So why would I lie. I had a very thorough physical way back when I applied for the policy...I completed all the forms, I couldn't believe what was happening. I spoke with the broker who I maintained contact with all these years and he said he would do what he could....he spoke with them....we wrote letters...but they were having nothing to do with it. So there I was with no life insurance...now what am I going to do. We found another policy holder...it is costing me triple of what I was paying...and has a lot more limitations. The life insurance policy does nothing for me, when your dead your dead. It is however giving me peace of mind that if I were to die tomorrow at least I know I would have left something for my hubby and family.

Personally I wouldn't have gone for the life insurance....but when I went for mortgage insurance they turned me down. Again I was shocked. I was turned down because of my pacemaker and colitis...I am considered a high risk. High risk....bull s..t. I run regularly, I am not over weight, I don't have hypertension or cholesterol issues...none of the risk factors which would normally be considered. So as a result I went to increase my life insurance policy and that is how the whole mess with the life insurance started.

I have home insurance coverage....but right now as it stands it would be void as it says we don't have a wood burning fireplace, but we do....we always have....I have personally been to the agent on three occasions to get this changed but it hasn't happened....I know I have to pursue that more.

I have a loan that I got an insurance policy on in case of injury/illness. I went to go make a claim on this policy this past month......again they are making me jump through hoops to get them to pay up for the loan( and this is not asking them to pay out the loan it's only asking that they pay the monthly loan). I am still paying the loan....I just wanted it covered while I was off on sick leave....chances are it won't get covered by the time I go back to work....it's been useless. You see I couldn't even claim for it until I had been off work for 6 weeks then of course all the medical forms have to be completed by myself and my doctor...which I had done....but no...they send me and my doctor more letters telling us about all these restrictions and how they want more information...like I said by the time I get this approved...if I do get it approved....I will be back at work and won't need it.

Health care, in Canada we have universal health care. What the means is if you have to have surgery you can have the surgery...there is no such thing as an HMO dictating your treatment. Most employers offer health benefit packages which often includes not only health coverage, but extended health(prescriptions, glasses,massage therapy, and chiropractor just to name a few)dental and long term disability insurance. Now if your employer does not offer this or if you are a retiree you still can get the basic provincial health insurance which again covers any doctors visit, hospitalization, surgeries and the likes. If you can't afford the provincial premiums then there are systems in place where the government would pay for such services. But you would have to prove eligibility for such services. Which I think is only right.

So, I talked to my brother who is an insurance adjuster about the whole insurance thing. He said to me that insurance companies are not out there to pay your claims or make our lives easier....they are out there to make money...and you making a claims takes money away...so of course they are going to do whatever they can not to pay out on a claim.

So let me recap this....I have life insurance which is very restrictive..and I truly wonder if I were to die tomorrow if my hubby would be able to get anything....but that would be a battle he would have to fight. The house insurance as it stands isn't worth the paper it is drawn up on because we have a wood burning fireplace and the loan insurance company is already giving me the run around. To me insurance is truly a scam in the greatest sense of the word and yet it is consider acceptable and prudent. But that has been falsely fed to us by the insurance companies.

I have fed into this insurance scam and allowed them to provide me with a false sense of security, that they will be there when you need them.

When I was looking for pictures to coincide with this post I came across this one cartoon...it was a picture of the insurance agent on the one side of the desk and two snowmen on the other the caption said "Are you prepared if one of you melts" That was just the icing on the cake.

Let's get real.....

So I have really been trying to take every one's advice and just lay low and relax and heal. So I have read a few books and a text book for work, and done a lot of television watching....something I don't do a whole heck of a lot of.

Wow is day time TV full of crap or what.....You've got your Jerry Springer who's guests are always fighting with each other on stage...we see way to much flesh and at times it's beyond obscene...then you have Maury Povich....who dedicates most of his shows on teen pregnancy and who's your daddy...lie detectors and so on....throw into the mix all those Judge Murphy and Judge Joe and the likes....and of course let's not forget those home decorating shows...telling you how to decorate and drop an easy $1000 on some faux throw or something...or better yet what about shows like What not to wear? Dear god who died and made these two hosts the guru's for fashion....have you seen what they wear sometimes? Then there is the reality TV shows...now that is when it gets really interesting......The nanny, or Wife Swap....I ask you who on this planet would want to up lift their lives and go live with some strange family for a couple of weeks who's morals and cultural beliefs are so opposing to you own? Or what about that show...oh what is it called? hmmmm let me think....oh yeah it's something about all these California housewives...who all act like they are in their teens, behave worse than some toddlers and live off of their husbands fortunes and spend their days at spas, shopping and having body augmentation.....oh my goodness.....reality TV really really sucks!!!! Bring on the books.

Then if the programming isn't bad enough you get inundated with really bad commercials...and again I have found that day time commercials to be far worse then evening.... and are certainly geered towards a certain market. The female market... and based on the commercials I gather they think all stay at home mom's are obsessed with either wanting to lose weight, clean windows with the latest cleaners...or wash floors with some fancy shmancy floor cleaner and mop. But for me.....nothing burns my twizzlers more than commercials that keep telling us about losing weight.


Especially this time of year....just after the holidays....telling us to lose those extra pounds...blah blah blah....Ok I know we all need to be accountable for living healthy life styles and making good life choices. So where am I going with this you might ask. Well I was watching a Special K commercial today....and well it made me mad.....now it's not the first time I have watched this commercial....oh no....I have seen it a few times...and the more I watched it the more infuriated I got about it. It's a woman and her daughter playing outside...running around a snowman that they have just finished making....note I mentioned they were already outdoors doing something active. The mom is wearing a white coat, red scarf, hat and mittens. The young daughter pipes up and say something along the lines that her mom looks like the snowman.....at first I thought well yeah...they are dressed similar...but that to me is where it ends. The Special K folks want us to think that mom is over weight and needs to lose some weight...the next scene they show mom in the kitchen eating a bowel of Special K.....mom by no means was over weight.....

As I said it infuriated me...I thought what kind of images are they sending our daughters and other women.....So being the person that I am I felt that I needed to write a letter. So I went onto the web and found both the Canadian and US advertising and marketing representatives...and sent off an email explaining my displeasure with this particular advertisement. Now I don't know if it will get me anywhere....but I couldn't just sit by and say nothing. It was important to me to let them know I found this particular commercial in poor taste. One of the things I suggested they look at when they do commercials like this was to look at the persons BMI(body mass index)which is used to determine if someone is truly over weight. As I said the woman they had portrayed in the commercial was by no means overweight...and I just didn't understand what message they where trying to send.

So what I am saying here....couple of things...there's a lot of bad daytime tv out there....that portrays women in a bad light....and as an individual if I find something offensive then I need to speak up....I maybe only one voice....but one voice is better than no voice.

Have a great day....and might I suggest you pick up a good book or puzzle or better yet get out for a walk if possible...and turn off the TV. Cheers all?

Do you know the signs of a heart attack?

Yesterday a dear blogging friend of mine instant messaged me...I didn't get the message right away but when I did I contacted her right away.....we addressed each other with the usual social niceties when I said, how are you doing...her response was.....I don't know....not sure.......of course my immediate response was ....what's up?....she responded by telling me she hadn't been feeling well.....she went on to describe symptoms she was having....nausea, vomiting,cold sweat, pain between the scapulae(shoulder blades)elevated blood pressure...and slightly low heart rate.....hmmmmm...of course this could be a variety of things...however my dear friend does have a cardiac background. How are you feeling right now....tired, dizzy and weak was her response.....her family had wanted her to go to the ER but she didn't want to. I suggested strongly she listen to them and go. I told her she could be having a cardiac event and that it isn't something to sit around and wait to see if something else happens. I told her that if she had called 911 and gave them her symptoms I was sure they would tell her to go to the ER. In the ER they can hook you up to a cardiac monitor take some blood work and quickly rule out if you are having a cardiac event. To many people wait far to long before seeking medical attention for cardiac symptoms....they don't believe anything is wrong...it will pass. In the medical field we have a saying..."Time is muscle" if you are having a cardiac event the sooner you present to the ER the more cardiac muscle can be saved.....that being if you are having a cardiac event there are certain drugs that can be given but they need to be given within a certain time frame....so "Time is muscle"

So, after my friends incident last evening, I thought....how many people don't even know the signs or symptoms of a heart attack. So I thought I would do my public service and post information which I got from the Canadian Heart and Stroke foundations. Below are the signs of symptoms of a heart attack and what to do.....please take the time to read....

"Thousands of Canadians die from heart attacks every year because they don’t get medical treatment quickly enough. Learn to recognize the signals of a heart attack, so you can react quickly – to save a life."

Pain
-sudden discomfort or pain that does not go away with rest
-pain that may be in the chest, neck, jaw, shoulder, arms or back
-pain that may feel like burning, squeezing, heaviness, tightness or pressure
in women, pain may be more vague
-chest pain or discomfort that is brought on with exertion and goes away with rest
-shortness of breath
-difficulty breathing

Nausea
-indigestion
-vomiting
-Sweating
-cool, clammy skin

Fear
-anxiety
-denial

If you are experiencing any of these signals, you should:

-CALL 9-1-1 or your local emergency number immediately, or have someone call for you. Keep a list of emergency numbers near the phone at all times.
-Stop all activity and sit or lie down, in whatever position is most comfortable.
-If you take nitroglycerin, take your normal dosage.
-If you are experiencing chest pain, chew and swallow one adult 325 mg ASA tablet (acetylsalicylic acid, commonly referred to as Aspirin®) or two 80 mg tablets. Pain medicines such as acetaminophen (e.g. Tylenol) or ibuprofen (e.g. Advil®) do not work the same way as ASA (i.e. Aspirin®) and therefore will not help in the emergency situation described above.
-Rest comfortably and wait for emergency medical services (EMS) (e.g., ambulance) to arrive.

QUICK ACTION SAVES LIVES

So my friends please don't ignore the symptoms.....as health care professional we would recommend you come to the hospital and be able to tell you your heart is OK rather than the alternative .....you not make it to the hospital.

I wish you all good health....

If you would like more information you can check out the Canadian Heart and Stroke Foundation or American Heart Association